Sometimes

I feel as if I'm crazy.
My mind dribbling up and down constantly, never sticking to a firm state, I feel as a girl composed of multiple insane parts. The happier I get, the further I fall into that empty abyss of depression.

I'm stuck in this ambivalence, this yin and yang of love and hate.
And it's tearing me apart, I can't hold myself together.
I wear the face of both tears and smiles.

Roses always bloom with attached thorns. How ironic.

I haven't written in awhile- too absorbed in my mundane activities of life- I rarely pick up the pen and my journal and just pour down my thoughts and emotions. Even when I am merely staring into the blank canvas of my walls, I let my mind remain motionless. In other words, I have become indolent.

I need a muse. Soon.

Life

Bitter
Sweet
you are
you are
Sweet
Bitter

Jigsaw

I never know what I'm doing.

I just pick at the pieces of my puzzle, hoping the final picture I create will be a beautiful masterpiece, instead of a chaotic mess.

I peered at the creations of others and followed their picture, and tried to create a similar replica so that "someday, mine will be that awe-striking."
But somewhere along the way, I started filtering my own pieces, mixing and matching, hoping to create the final picture that depicted a harmonious mosaic.

And I still don't know if the pieces I choose are the befitting ones, or the ones that will ultimately leave a flawed spot in the finished product.

So here's to the uncertainty of it all.

May my puzzle turn out beautiful.

Today

I am inarticulate.